December 27, 2007

Glob my blog!

E Ajunul Craciunului.I can feel it.I can smell it as well.
Imi dau seama ca e Craciun dupa ce citesc nota din organizer: "24-12-2007 Birthday Jesus".
Ma dau jos din pat si ma infiintez la PC>mess.Very Xmas-ish IMs bombardement:
"Sa aveti parte de un Craciun plin de bucurii"
"Sarbatori fericite 2 all :*:)"
"Vand Nokia xxxx prv me"
Well,not the last one.
Se pare ca nu e scapare.Lista de offlines este mai lunga decat scrisorile pe care i le "trimiteam" "Mosului"*
Got outside.Liniste specifica sarbatorilor.Soferii claxonand a la Istambul,pietonii traversand a la "Sheepish" si politistul care dirijeaza a la "Treci odata in plm".Foarte fain.Mie imi place Bucurestiul asa.E foarte viu,cu toate ca,la cat de des auzi de morti,mai ales de aia care ies din gura taximetristilor...Au si dreptate.Uite,stateam si ma gandeam intr-o zi,daca tot exista Valu lu Traian,de ce nu se numeste si Bucurestiul "Valu lu Videan",nu de alta,dar sunt cam multe astfel de forme de relief urbane* [forme geomorfologice aparute in urma actiunii tarnacopului lu Dorel]
Pe trotuar e insa ceva mai linistit,foarte putini care merg,asta pentru ca multi s-au mutat pe banda I,langa masinile parcate si cei cu lamaie pe parbriz.Asta pentru ca Valurile lu Videan stau cuminti pe juma' de trotuar.E frumos.E chiar deviant art-ish.Prin urmare,valurile lu Videan e CUL.
Nu poti merge 10 metri pe strada fara sa auzi topicurile de sarbatori:
"Ce cadou sa ii iau?"
"Mai ai reteta aia de prajitura?"
"Mi-a spus fii-miu aseara ca Mos Craciun nu exista si ca,de fapt eu sunt Mos Craciun."
[e drept,asta era in autobuz,dar mi-a placut mult.Plus,she was also good looking.MILF u might say]
In centre comerciale...well,I can't say much,pentru ca eram mai mult atent pe unde merg.Yes,sardines-like-even feeling.
Nu am vazut craciunitze,to be honest.Probabil ca mai toate sunt pe Youtube.Yeah,you're famous on the Internet,biatch!And still,I can't believe you took the whole damn thing.
Home at last.Smells nice.
Probabil ca tot mirosu e si cel care i-a atras pe colindatori.Well,colindatori my ass.
Intre un "Dom',Dom',let's get high!" si "O,ce veste minunata/Pe YM! data" isi gasesc timp sa mai bage si un Minune,Salam sau Bursuc la molecular.See,this is the difference between american ol'skool colindatori & niggas [more or less] de Rahova : americanu probabil ca venea cu boombox-ul pe umar,si iti punea si de-un breakdance,dressed properly,in a Satan Claws suit.Spin,nigga,spin.See,told you Santa's black!!!
Seara de Craciun ma prinde pe mess,vorbind cu Mos Craciun,care era la o cafenea WiFi de la Unirii.He was fed up!He comes to Bucharest,he gets stuck in traffic,isi paradeste jantele bling de la sanie in hartoapele patriei,renii ajung sa traga un cabriolet cu coviltir,iar sania,aflata inca in leasing,e trasa de o caruta,care merge agale spre centrul de colectare a fierului vechi.Feeric!
Merry Christmas,Santa & Merry Xmess,Y!M users!

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* - either Mos "Spanky,Spanky,BDSM,spanky" Nicolae**,either fat ol' Kringle
** - spanky - it seems so,because Saint Nick here developed a passion for sending spanking sticks as gifts.I thought he was a BDSM fan as well,that's why I asked for a fetish ball to go well with the spanky tool,but received no answer,nor fetish ball.That's when I stopped believing in Saint Nicholas.But,still believed in Santa,cause he left me a fetish ball under the tree.This proves that Santa does exist,kids!

2 comments:

galani said...

=))=)) just laughed my ass out... really nice post, biatch!!!

Wabbit said...

Well,I guess U probably laught because of my "demands" for Santa/St. Nick.
Hey,man...I couldn't ask for cars,dammit!I would've put my biiiiiigg screw driver on'em.This way,I made all my cars go to "car heaven".
And neither ask for dolls.Surely U'll say....why not ask for 2 Barbies & 1 Ken,so U can have girl/doll 2 girl/doll action.Well,Barbie is rubbish : she ain't got HOLES!!! Neither nipples :"> ! And plus...I could've ask for a Barbie & 15 Action-Men.Still it would've sucked,because,like Ken [who's a metrosexual,in my oppinion],Action-Man is CRUCHLESS!! And plus...it can't stick its tongue out.Let's not talk about his hands...no wanking,no pink-cave explorating!Sad,sad Ken!Sad,NFDHH Barbie!